rrD-8 rrD r5<D-8 rrpDr.pD _rD + r rD+ r+`Drr3ZDr+`~ V dvWaj@+1@@E**M 4X 1J+&1J`i ,1 0*9+-$,.,/`S (`Zd)z~/ ,9+? (`]d,9+?",3 (`ad *03,98,5+?,"c&,3 8icQ*A`d(\0XV>,B,bvfr+C`gd ,r <`h.9~VM9(EHECHY@g&~@  @@g&~@  @ H`@g&~@ @@g&~@ zM@e@@M&ut@ >~;1 There was a young girl of Aberystwyth Who took grain to the mill to get grist with. The miller's sun, Jack, Laid her flat on her back, A1iG@Jnd united the organs they pissed with.  xi p; ~N2 There was a young lady of Arden, The tool of whose swain wouldn't harden. Said she with a frown, "I've been sadly let down By the tool o l+X]f a fool in a garden."  ScM pN C3 There once was a yokel of Beaconsfield Engaged to look after the deacon's field, But he lurked in the ditches And diddled the bitches Whϵo happened to cross that antique 'un's field. w_dxj  44 There's a charming young lady named Beaulieu Who's often been screwed by yours truly, But now--it's appallin'-- My balls always fall in! ` I fear that I've fucked her unduly.  P I 5 There was a young girl in Berlin Who was fucked by an elderly Finn. Though he diddled his best, And fucked her with zest, She kept askinٝ+g, "Hey, Pop, is it in?" shY\xk p ]16 I wooed a stewed nude in Bermuda, I was lewd, but my God! she was lewder. She said it was crude To be wooed in the nude-- I persued her,O subdued her, and screwed her! -1 p~+7 There was a young lady of Bicester Who was nicer by far than her sister: The sister would giggle And wiggle and jiggle, But this one wou3iYmAP:ld come if you kissed her. bjzxl + ~=8 There once was a son-of-a-bitch, Neither clever, nor handsome, nor rich, Yet the girls he would dazzle, And fuck to a frazzle, And then гCHLditch them, the son-of-a-bitch! a%H) 8= -9 There once was a young fellow named Blaine, And he screwed some disgusting old jane. She was ugly and smelly, With an awful pot-belly, Bk%nut... well, they were caught in the rain. REN_xm x *~c10 There was a young sailor form Brighton Who remarked to his girl, "You're a tight one." She replied, "'Pon my soul, You're in the wrong hog7G0rle; There's plenty of room in the right one. ;Av8x 0c }~w11 A lacklustre lady of Brougham Weaveth all night at her loom. Anon she doth blench When her lord and his wench Pull a chain in the neigh! nkh bouring room. Xz?xn (w 12 A middle-aged codger named Bruin Found his love life completely a-ruin, For he flirted with flirts Wearing pants and no skirts, And he B @[/ -never got in for no screwin'. %s   e~ 13 There was a young fellow of Burma Whose betrothed had good reason to murmur. But now that he's married he's Been using cantharides And |XI@ )the root of their love is much firmer. 'BK4\xo p  ~ -14 There was a young fellow from Cal., In bed with a passionate gal. He leapt from the bed, To the toilet he sped; Said the gal, "What aboCt4` 15 There was a young man from Calcutta Who was heard in his beard to mutter, "If her Bartholin glands Don't respond to my hands, I'm afrai o5YH Md I shall have to use butter." lCxp 0 > = 16 There once was a kiddie named Carr Caught a man on top of his mar. As he saw him stick 'er, He said with a snicker, "You do it much fas;} ter than par." (jy 2 17 There was a young fellow named Charteris Put his hand where his young lady's garter is. Said she, "I don't mind, And higher up you'll fin>&s d The place where my fucker and farter is." 3r-xq  D 18 A young woman got married at Chester, Her mother she kissed and she blessed her. Says she, "You're in luck, He's a stunning good fuck, 3Y For I've had him myself down in Leicester. >]{l Y~ 19 "For the tenth time, dull Daphnis," said Chloe, "You have told me my bosom is snowy; You have made much fine verse on Each part of my perr0 son, Now do something -- there's a good boy!" >3cg{xr 8  ~ 20 A maiden who wrote of big cities Some songs full of love, fun and pities, Sold her stuff at the shop Of a musical wop Who played with h2, :_~ L37 There was a young fellow named Fyfe Whose marriage was ruined for life, For he had an aversion To every perversion And only liked fucki8T!~ [ng his wife. Well, one year the poor woman struck, And she wept, and she cursed at her luck, And said, "Where have you gotten us With yo,?cC~ jur goddamn monotonous Fuck after fuck after fuck? "I once knew a harlot named Lou -- And a versatile girl she was, too. After ten years ofY{7j; y whoredom She perished of boredom When she married a jackass like you!" UB Lh{! L! L! Lex_n~40 There was a young lady of Gloucester, Met a passionate fellow who tossed her. She wasn't much hurt, But he dirtied her skirt, So think wPof the anguish it cost her. + ~41 There was a young lady of Gloucester Whose friends they thought they had lost her Till they found on the grass The marks of her arse, ArkH6estion's not woody but could he? %.( @'E s43 In my sweet little Alice Blue gown Was the first time I ever laid down, I was both proud and shy As he opened his fly And the moment I DB)yD saw it I thought I would die. Oh it hung almost down to the ground, As it went in I made not a sound, The more that he shoved it The morn e that I loved it, As he came on my Alice Blue gown. DD%)p~ s s,K 45 In my sweet little night gown of blue, On the first night that I slept with you, I was both shy and scared As the bed was prepared, Ande you played peekaboo with my ribbons of blue. As we both watched the break of day, And in peaceful submission I lay, You said you adored itt< But dammit, you tore it, My sweet little night gown of blue. Wsy]p   -+47 Winter is here with his grouch, The time when you sneeze and slouch. You can't take your women Canoein' or swimmin', But a lot can be d;'y*#one on a couch. $jx01t the mustard will make you come `plus tard'." gx 0"u~672 There was a young lad from Nahant Who was made like the Sensitve Plant. When asked, "Do you fuck?" He replied, "No such luck. I would i&:XEf I could but I can't." ˳ x673 There was a young man of Natal Who was fucking a Hottentot gal. Said she, "You're a sluggard!" Said he, "You be buggered! I like to fuclYk slow and I shall." $֥x Pb~Y74 There was a young man of Natal And Sue was the name of his gal. One day, north of Aden, He got his hard rod in, And came clear up Suez C8/phCanal.   pYp~i75 There was a gay dog from Ontario Who fancied himself a Lothario. At a wench's glance He'd snatch off his pants And make for her Mons Ve[]pphpxnerio. vx pip ~y76 There was a young man of Ostend Who let a girl play with his end. She took hold of Rover, And felt it all over, And it did what she did7hn't intend. 3_ y-77 There was a young man of Ostend Whose wife caught him fucking her friend. "It's no use, my duck, Interrupting our fuck, For I'm damned +1if I draw till I spend." :wMhx p(778 There was a young fellow from Parma Who was solemnly screwing his charmer. Said the damsel, demure, "You'll excuse me, I'm sure, But I oU[BUmust say you fuck like a farmer." i 7 8;~.79 A newly-wed man of Peru Found himself in a terrible stew: His wife was in bed Much deader than dead, And so he had no one to screw. z6LJx .H~=80 There was a young girl of Pitlochry Who was had by a man in a rockery. Sh said, "Oh! You've come All over my bum; This isn't a fuck -- `Lit's a mockery." u]! @=~N81 There was a young lady from Prentice Who had an affair with a dentist. To make things easier He used anesthesia, And diddled her, `non WG`]compos mentis'. WŇx 8N~_82 There was a young man with a prick Which into his wife he would stick Every morning and night If it stood up all right -- Not a very re?o{N$~nmarkable trick. His wife had a nice little cunt: It was hairy, and soft, and in front, And with this she would fuck him, Though sometimeӇ }s she'd suck him -- A charming, if commonplace, stunt. ^(g`#0_0_BPPx[so it again. כPW5U `~;101 There was a young man of high station Who was found by a pious relation Making love in a ditch To -- I won't say a bitch -- But a womnOfXJan of no reputation. \f=x `;102 There once was a dentist named Stone Who saw all his patients alone. In a fit of depravity He filled the wrong cavity, And my, how his VG practice has grown! JD ]7 P~^103 A sailor who slept in the sun Woke to find his fly buttons undone. He remarked with a smile, "Jesus Christ, a sundial! And it's now a Qe G`mquarter past one." t y$ax P^-~o104 A plumber whose name was Ten Brink Plumbed the cook as she bent o'er the sink. Her resistance was stout, And Ten Bring petered out Wit"@`q@~h his pipe-wrench all limber and pink. q;{9 poQ~105 The spouse of a pretty young thing Came home from the wars in the spring. He was lame but he came With his dame like a flame -- A disceuPharge is a wondeful thing. &x y~106 I wonder what my wife will want tonight; Wonder if the wife will fuss and fight? I wonder can she tell That I've been raising hell; WoL ~#nder if she'll know that I've been tight? My wife is just as nice as can be, I hope she doesn't feel to nice toward me, For an afternoon of EVNJ2joy Is hell on the old boy. I wonder what the wife will want tonight! {9j,PIr as much as you want to. = :~L109 Une joile epousetta a Tours Voulait de gig-gig tous le jours. Mais le mari disait, "Non! De trop n'est pas bon! Mon derriere exige du XPGh[secours!" x L|110 A pretty wife living in Tours Demanded her daily amour. But the husband said, "No! It's to much. Let it go! My backsides are draggingV|b# the floor." Q5B? ~m111 In the shade of the old apple tree Where between her fat legs I could see A little brown spot With the hair in a knot, And it certainlͻ+~|y looked good to me. I asked as I tickled her tit If she thought that my big thing would fit. She said it would do So we had a good scre"-~ w In the shade of the old apple tree. In the shade of the old apple tree I got all that was coming to me. In the soft dewy grass I had\{H~ a fine piece of ass From a maiden that was fine to see. I could hear the dull buzz of the bee As he sunk his grub hooks into me. Her ass $[o~x)it was fine But you should have seen mine In the shade of the old apple tree. (!N#` *hm*hm*hm*hm~jgc115 A lad from far-off Transvaal Was lustful, but tactful withal. He'd say, just for luck, "Mam'selle, do you fuck?" But he'd bow till he [gb|ualmost would crawl. @K~YWx"c Hv~C116 There was a young lady of Twickenham Who thought men had not enough prick in 'em. On her knees every day To god she would pray To leng=@Rthen and stregthen and thicken 'em. sZN E XC~V117 There was a young lady named Twiss Who said she thought fucking a bliss, For it tickled her bum And caused her to come .siht gniyl ylbR.yH`eatrofmoc elihW M|,ix# 0V9~g118 There once was a husky young Viking Whose sexual prowess was striking. Every time he got hot He would scour the twat Of some girl thatlPtPv might be to his liking. "}AG g]~y119 At the moment Japan declared war A sailor was fucking a whore. He said, "After this poke `Long and hard' ain't no joke; This means monQnaPths till I get back ashore." Kuf;x$ y~ 120 There was a young lady of Wheeling Said to her beau, "I've a feeling My little brown jug Has need of a plug" -- And straightaway she sw-`tarted to peeling. AgM+I P ~121 Two anglers were fishing off Wight And his bobber was dipping all night. Murmured she, with a laugh, "It's ready to gaff, But don't brNx&T'~+eak your rod which is light." A couple was fishing near Clombe When the maid began looking quite glum, And said, "Bother the fish! I'd r-~:ather coish!" Which they did -- which was why they had come. As two consular clerks in Madras Fished, hidden in deep shore-grass, "What a j!/ n~pImarvelous pole," Said she, "but control Your sinkers -- they're banging my ass." ^h;Qfh%!P!P!Piq3n~R124 Love letters no longer they write us, To their homes they so seldom invite us. It grieves me to say, They have learned with dismay, We}u"@@a can't cure their `vulva pruritus'. "~5.HM XR?~e125 There was a young student from Yale Who was getting his first piece of tail. He shoved in his pole, But in the wrong hole, And a voice%Ht from beneath yelled: "No sale!" i }x' @eg126 In the Garden of Eden lay Adam, Complacently stroking his madam, And loud was his mirth For on all of the earth There were only two bax?4x lls -- and he had 'em. kd+z6O `G~ 127 There was a young bride of Antigua Whose husband said, "Dear me, how big you are!" Said the girl, "What damn'd rot! Why, you've only felbcL0t my twot, My legs and my arse and my figua!" DHYxx( 8 ~128 There was a young damsel named Baker Who was poked in a pew by a Quaker. He yelled, "My God! what Do you call this -- a twat? Why, thH,e entrance is more than an acre!" 5sLeQ H_129 There was once a mechanic named Bench Whose best tool was a sturdy gut-wrench. With this vibrant device He could reach, in a trice, Th!a.}e innermost parts of a wench. bM4JSx)_ ~B130 There was a young man of Bengal Who swore he had only one ball, But two little bitches Unbuttoned his britches, And found he had no baz߇hQlls at all. @.)S B+131 A chippy who worked in Black Bluff Had a pussy as large as a muff. It had room for both hands And some intimate glands, And was soft aU99}s a little ducks's fluff. "7x* x'132 There was a young lady named Blount Who had a rectangular cunt. She learned for diversion Posterior perversion, Since no one could fit? here in front. |SI YU (:133 There was a young fellow named Bowen Whose pecker kept growin' and growin'. It grew so tremendous, So long and so pendulous, 'Twas no C godd for fuckin' -- just showin'. r x+ 8L~134 There was a young lady named Brent With a cunt of enormous extent, And so deep and so wide, The acoustics inside Were so good you coul%5Xd hear when you spent. W p3135 There was a young girl from the Bronix Who had a vagina of onyx. She had so much `tsoris' With her clitoris, She traded it in for a Pa}s Qckard. Nׇx,x3 `rS136 There was a young lady from Brussels Who was proud of her vaginal muscles. She could easily plex them And so interflex them As to whis+0%qtle love songs through her bustles. WYS Hy137 There was a young lady of Bude Who walked down the street in the nude. A bobby said, "Whattum Magnificent bottom!" And slapped it as h}:Siard as he could. @x-y 0138 There once was a queen of Bulgaria Whose bush had grown hairier and hairier, Till a prince from Peru Who came up for a screw Had to huSHnt for her cunt with a terrier. ,gvu[ ()~`139 There was a young girl of Cah'lina, Had a very capricious vagina: To the shock of the fucker "Twould suddenly pucker, And whistle the ,}`ochorus of "Dinah." ~7Hjx. P`y~q140 A lady with features cherubic Was famed for her area pubic. When they asked her its size She replied in surprise, "Are you speaking ofLru&QP square feet, or cubic?" %H] q~141 There was a fat lady of China Who'd a really enormous vagina, And when she was dead They painted it red, And used it for docking a lin"TGxer. C]x/ Xd%142 I met a young man in Chungking Who had a very long thing -- But you'll guess my surprise When I found that its size Just measured a thMk0}Cird-finger ring! Y@#d_% 0rG143 There was a young man of Coblenz Whose ballocks were simply immense: It took forty-four draymen, A priest and three laymen To carry th}Neem thither and thence. ~woa2x0G `~5144 There was an old man of Connaught Whose prick was remarkably short. When he got into bed The old woman said, "This isn't a prick, it's60dohD a wart." rl!a 5|-145 There once was a girl from Cornell Whose teats were shaped like a bell. When you touched them they shrunk, Except when she was drunk, 񟌀SAnd then they got bigger than hell. )-BJx1 H(146 There once was a lady of Crete So enormously broad in the beam That one day in the ocean She caused such commotion That Admiral Byrd c0qAlaimed her for America. Aqc h<~j147 There was a young fellow named Cribbs Whose cock was so big it had ribs. They were inches apart, And to suck it took art, While to fucpPyk it took forty-two trips. x2 j~|148 There was a young lady whose cunt Could accomodate a small punt. Her mother said, "Annie, It matches your fanny, Which never was that L݇h of a runt." Noe |149 There's a young Yiddish slut with two cunts, Whose pleasure in life is to pruntz. When one pireg is shot, There's that alternate twat, ^_7 But the ausgefuckt male merely grunts. 6ZS5Tx3 hs~ 150 There was a young man from Dallas Who had an exceptional phallus. He couldn't find room In any girl's womb Without rubbing it first wilޖ7h/th Vitalis. \ g  a151 There was a young girl of Des Moines Whose cunt could be fitted with coins, Till a guy from Hoboken Went and dropped in a token, And nX):Gow she rides free on the ferry. x4a (~C152 To his bride said the keen-eyed detective, "Can it be that my eyesight's defective? Has the east tit the least bit The best of the west a*{8Rtit, Or is it the faulty perspective?" XdQ1bi CY153 There was a young girl of Detroit Who at fucking was very adroit: She could squeeze her vagina To a pin-point, or finer, Or open it ouY1->t like a quoit. And she had a friend named Durand Whose cock could contract or expand. He could diddle a midge Or the arch of a bridge -:rE^- Their performance together was grand! Ap5\\[~y155 There was a young man of Devizes Whose balls were of different sizes. His tool when at ease, Hung down to his knees, Oh, what must it L?Z`be when it rises! Ywx6 Hy~( 156 Visas erat: huic geminarum Dispar modus testicularum: Minor haec nihili, Palma triplici, Jam fecerat altera clarum. {swm(  /157 There was a young fellow whose dong Was prodigiously massive and long. On each side of his whang Two testes did hang That attracted a iMcurious throng. 8}Ňx7/ ( Q158 There was a young man from East Wubley Whose cock was bifurcated doubly. Each quadruplicate shaft Had two balls hanging aft, And the gvYQoeneral effect was quite lovely. =]oQ ( ~;159 While I, with my usual enthusiasm, Was exploring in Ermintrude's busiasm, She explained, "They are flat, But think nothing of that -- Y@(mg0JYou will find that my sweet sister Susiasm." GJYx8 ; W~O160 There was a young fellow from Florida Who liked a friend's wife, so he borrowed her. When they got into bed He cried, "God strike me dea!Ua8^d! This ain't a cunt -- it's a corridor!" q O 161 An old man at the Folies Bergere Had a jock, a most wondrous affair: It snipped off a twat-curl From each new chorus girl, And he had x@W a wig made of the hair. Yoasx9 h U~t162 There was a young man with one foot Who had a very long root. If he used this peg As an extra leg Is a question exceedingly moot. Ĝs tD ~163 In the case of a lady named Frost, Whose cunt's a good two feet acrost, It's the best part of valor To bugger the gal, or You're apt t{QXo fall in and get lost. a'x: x )164 A certain young person of Ghent, Uncertain if lady or gent, Shows his organs at large For a small handling charge To assist him in payGRGing the rent. gxNhCu) ! ~%165 There was an old woman of Ghent Who swore that her cunt had no scent. She got fucked so often At last she got rotten, And didn't she s;H3X4tink when she spent. 4_mx; `%!7m166 There was a young man from Glengozzle Who found a remarkable fossil. He knew by the bend And the wart on the end, 'Twas the peter of Pe^aul the Apostle. -wm 0!.167 There was a young fellow of Greenwich Whose balls were all covered with spinach. He had such a tool It was wound on a spool, And he reO eled it out inich by inich. But this tale has an unhappy finich, For due to the sand in the spinach His ballocks grew rough And wrecked 1l)his wife's muff, And scratched up her thatch in the scrimmage. C p<a169 A mathematician named Hall Had a hexhedronical ball, And the cube of its weight Times his pecker, plus eight, Was four fifths of five Cykeighths of fuck-all. Sx= P!g~~170 There was a young fellow of Harrow Whose john was the size of a marrow. He said to his tart, "How's this for a start? My balls are out,\ZfQ`side in a barrow." u5?{ P~!~171 There was a young fellow named Harry, Had a joint that was long, huge and scary. He pressed it on a virgin Who, without any urgin', ImHmeadiately spread like a fairy. wBox> 8"C172 There was a young girl named Heather Whose twitcher was made out of leather. She made a queer noise, Which attracted the boys, By flap|=_aping the edges together. "y195 There was a young man of Madras Whose balls were constructed of brass. When jangled together They played "Stormy Weather," And lightniRp"ng shot out of his ass. VqvrxJ"y h%Q~"N196 A bad little girl in Madrid, A most reprehensible kid, Told her Tante Louise That her cunt smelled like cheese, And the worst of it waׇ`"]s that it did! >Zy 0"N%~"_197 There was ayoung man from Maine Whose prick was as strong as a crane; It was almost as long, So he strolled with his dong Extended in }A'r`"nsunshine and rain. AwxK P"_%~"p198 There was a young girl from Medina Who could completely control her vagina. She could twist it around Like the cunts that are found Iny> `P"Japan, Manchukuo and China. }WHn "p&~#199 There was a young fellow named Morgan Who possessed an unusual organ: The end of his dong, Which was nine inches long, Was tipped withzX# the head of a gorgon. F xL p#&5#'200 There was a young soldier from Munich Whose penis hung down past his tunic, And their chops girls would lick When they thought of his pr/={A#Eick, But alas! he was only a eunuch. 3 kRM#' `&-#M201 There was a young lady of Natchez Who chanced to be born with two snatches, And she often said, "Shit! Why, I'd give either tit For a ^#kman with equipment that matches." There was a young fellow named Locke Who was born with a two-headed cock. When he'd fondle the thing IzW _#t would rise up and sing An antiphonal chorus by Bach. But whether these two ever met Has not been recorded as yet, Still, it would be div$S`w#erting To see him inserting His whang while it sang a duet. 'LvhM#M#M#M8-#204 A girl of uncertain nativity Had an ass of extreme sensitivity While she sat on the lap Of a German or Jap, She could sense Fifth Coluܮ#mn activity. N`# &x~#k205 There was a gay parson of Norton Whose prick, although thick, was a short 'un. To make up for this loss, He had balls like a horse, An+`!@#zd never spent less than a quartern. sGRvXxO X#k'~#~206 A farmer I know named O'Doole Had a long and incredible tool. He can use it to plow, Or to diddle a cow, Or just as a cue-stick at pooL>&Qx$l. ~5 P#~`';$207 A chap down in Oklahoma Had a cock that could sing La Paloma, But the sweetness of pitch Couldn't put off the hitch Of impotence, sizeٿ$9 and aroma. txg(xP$ '.~$208 There was a young girl named O"Malley Who wanted to dance in the ballet. She got roars of applause When she kicked off her drawers, BuŮŇ@$-t her hair and her bush didn't tally. _vc h$'~$1209 There was a young maiden from Osset Whose quim was nine inches across it. Said a young man named Tong, With tool nine inches long, "I'rI#H$@ll put bugger-in if I loss it." J%xQ 8$1'$210 "The testes are cooler outside," Said the doc to the curious bride, "For the semen must no Get too fucking hot, And the bag fans your 5fk$bum on the ride." @6"H$ 8'g$211 There was a young fellow named Paul Who confessed, "I have only one ball. But the size of my prick Is God's dirtiest trick, For my gir $ls always ask, 'Is that all?'" N1^axR$ 'y~$g212 There was a young girl of Pawtucket Whose box was as big as a bucket. Her boy-friend said, "Toots, I'll have to wear boots, For I see EH$vI must muck it, not fuck it." ^g. ($g($213 When I was a baby, my penis Was as white as the buttocks of Venus. But now 'this as red As her nipples instead-- All because of the fe(.He%minie genus! 7xS$ ( ~% 214 Two roosters in one of our pens Found their pricks were no larger than wens. As they looked at their foreskins And wished they had more @:(%skins, They discovered they'd both become hens. vF  H% (c%=215 There was a young fellow of Perth Whose balls were the finest on earth. They grew to such size That one won a prize, And goodness know,E%[s what they were worth. NYxT%= h(G~%0216 To his bride a young bridegroom said, "Pish! Your cunt is as big as a dish!" She replied, "Why, you fool, With your limp little tool I=@%?t's like driving a nail with a fish!" Bb h%0(~%C217 A very odd pair are the Pitts: His balls are as large as here tits, Her tits are as large As an invasion barge-- Neither knows how the5`%R other cohabits. 4LIxU @%C(~%T218 A young man from the banks of the Po Found his cock had elongated so, That when he'd pee It was not he But only his neighbors who'd kny![;x%cow. X X%Td(%219 There was a young fellow named Prynne Whose prick was so short and so thin, His wife found she needed A Fuckoscope--she did-- To see iȟ%f he'd gotten in. _xV% 8)%220 A beautiful lady named Psyche Is loved by a fellow named Ikey. One thing about Ike The lady can't like Is his prick, which is dreadful&ly spikey. Hw% )"~&221 There was a fat man from Rangoon Whose prick was much like a ballon. He tried hard to ride her And when finally inside her She thoughtv)nSnP& she was pregnant too soon. ixW &)g~&222 There was a young fellow called Rex With diminutive organs of sex. When charged with exposure He said with composure, "De minimis non 0h&&curat lex!" o1 &)&O223 There was a young lady named Riddle Who had an untouchable middle. She had many friends Because of her ends, Since it isn't the middle0&m you diddle. 2gX\xX&O )X~&8224 There was a young man from Salinas Who had an extremely long penis: Believe it or not, When he lay on his cot It reached from Marin toEYh&G Martinez. ctf &8)&225 There was a young harlot named Schwartz Whose cock-pit was studded with warts, And they tickled so nice She drew a high price From theڔ%& studs at the summer resorts. Her pimp, a young fellow named Biddle, Was seldom hard up for a didle, For according to rumor His tool had0I& a tumor And a fine row of warts down the middle. Her brother, a bastard named Ben, Could rotate his pecker, and then He would shoot throu&gh his rear Which made him dear Of the girls, and the envy of men. Her other young brother, named Saul, Was able to bounce either ball, GH;$' He could stretch them and snap them, And juggle and clap them, Which earned him the plaudits of all. jS,`@`Y & & & &j]'229 The skater, Barbara Ann Scott Is so fuckingly "winsome" a snot, That when posed on her toes She elaborately shows Teeth, fat ass, titt(|[$'=ies and twat. Կx[' *F~' 230 A cowhand way out in Seattle Had a dooflicker flat as a paddle. He said, "No, I can't fuck A lamb or a duck, But golly! it just fits t.(h'/he cattle." └ ' *'a231 There was a young man from Seattle Whose testicles tended to rattle. He said as he fucked Some stones in a bucket, "If Stravinsky won'4't deafen you -- that'll." 3iJ%ux\'a *i'232 There's a lovely young lady named Shittlecock Who loves to play diddle and fiddle-cock, But her cunt's got a pucker That's best not to fl'uck, or When least you expect it to, it'll lock. 9R(' @*|~'W233 There was an old fellow named Skinner Whose prick, his wife said, had grown thinner. But still, by and large, It would always discharge*@'f Once he could just get it in her. cx] X'W+#~'j234 An ingenious young man in South Bend Made a synthetic arse for a friend, But the friend shortly found Its construction unsound, It wasHtubP'y simply a bother -- no end.  'j+K~'|235 An aesthete from South Carolina Had a cock that tickled like China, But while shooting his load It cracked like old Spode, So he's bouU275 There was an old man of Brienz The length of whose cock was immense: With one swerve he could plug A boy's bottom in Zug, And a kitcheP% %P-Mn-maid's cunt in Coblenz. ^qg[xr ->1E~-P276 There once was a Duchess of Bruges Whose cunt was incredibly huge. Said the king to this dame As he thunderously came: "Mon Dieu! AprCX-_es moi, le deluge!" | X-P1k-277 There was an old man of Cajon Who never could get a good bone. With the aid of a gland It grew simply grand; Now his wife cannot leave3S- it alone. jq.284 A team playing baseball in Dallas Called the umpire a shit out of malice. While this worthy had fits The team made eight hits And a gi-.rl in the bleachers named Alice. ((=|. 02R~.w285 There was a young girl of Darjeeling Who could dance with such exquisite feeling There was never a sound For miles around Save of fly-cP/buttons hitting the ceiling. -5^xw .w2~/ 286 There was a young woman in Dee Who stayed with each man she did see. When it came to a test She wished to be best, And practice makes ZvvM`/perfect, you see. eN H/ 2~/287 There was a family named Doe, An ideal family to know. As father screwed mother, She said, "You're heavier than brother." And he said,7PjjX/) "Yes, Sis told me so!" vssxx x/3/W288 A lady, by passion deluded, Found an African drunk and denuded, And -- fir as a fiddle, And hot for a diddle -- She tied splints to hiTי/us penis and screwed it. As/W h3~/=289 There was a strong man of Drumrig Who one day did seven times frig. He buggered three sailors, Four Jews and two tailors, And ended byG`/L fucking a pig. ixy 8/=3_~/N290 There was an old man of Duluth Whose cock was shot off in his youth. He fucked with his nose And with fingers and toes, And he came thX 4H0ice as much fun in the middle." gṇx{ 8030)294 I dined with Lord Hughing Fitz-Bluing Who said, "Do you squirm when you're screwing?" I replied, "Simple shagging Without any wagging  0~4~1301 A passionate red-headed girl, When you kissed her, her senses would whirl, And her twat would get wet And would wiggle and fret, And hb aG.@1er cunt-lips would curl and unfurl. k j&[x X15~1#302 There was a young lady named Gloria Who was had by Sir Gerald Du Maurier, And then by six men, Sir Gerald again, And the band at the WA`12aldorf-Astoria. ' 81#5E~14303 Thank God for the Duchess of Gloucester, She obliges all who accost her. She welcomes the prick Of Tom, Harry or Dick, Or Baldwin, or ,*MP7`1Ceven Lord Astor. 5x @145i~1E304 The latest reports from Good Hope State that apes there have pricks thick as rope, And fuck high, wide, and free, From the top of one trRD01Tee To the top of the next -- what a scope! brUS 1E5~1Y305 A newlywed couple from Goshen Spent their honeymoon sailing the ocean. In twenty-eight days They got laid eighty ways -- Imagine such s`1hfucking devotion! lx H1Y5~1j306 There was a young fellow named Grimes Who fucked his girl seventeen times In the course of a week -- And this isn't to speak Of assortd*?TRX1yed venereal crimes. i8(C X1j51307 There was a young lady named Hatch Who would always come through in a scratch. If a guy wouldn't neck her, She'd grab up his pecker An0M(E;2d shove the damn thing up her snatch. (U\lax1 X62308 There was a young lady named Hilda Who went for a walk with a builder. He knew that he could, And he should, and he would -- And he di"2;d -- and he goddam near killed her! 큘2 H62C309 Cum Hilde autem ambulabat Homo qui aedificabat. Dixit volebat. Debet et potebat. Sic ille ducebat. Statim faciebat. Sed virginem pin_gw2ae necebat. mQBox2C 6(~22310 I know of a fortunate Hindu Who is sought in the towns that he's been to By the ladies he knows, Who are thrilled to the toes By the tF00CR@2Aricks that he makes his foreskin do. \y `226s~2E311 If you're speaking of actions immoral The how about giving the laurel To doughty Queen Esther, No three men could best her -- One foreՐGP2T, and one aft, and one oral. k'e)@x 2E6~2W312 There was a young miss from Johore Who'd lie on a mat on the floor; In a manner uncanny She'd wobble her fanny, And drain your nuts drw'`2fy to the core.   02W6~2h313 There was a young fellow of Kent Whose prick was so long that it bent, So to save himself trouble He put it in double, And instead of X2r`2wcoming he went. x 82h6~2y314 There was a young man of Kildare Who was fucking a girl on the stair. The bannister broke, But he doubled his stroke And finished her F[`3off in mid-air. w 82y7 ~3 315 A young man of Llanfairpwllgwyngyll While bent over plucking a dingle Had the whole of Eisteddfod Taking turns at his pod While they sW=-UUP3ang some impossible jingle. 2s:x 3 7-~3316 There once were two brothers named Luntz Who buggered each other at once. When asked to account For this intricate mount, They said, "4y'Hy@3+Ass-holes are tighter than cunts." ;S P37S~3/317 There was a young lady named Mable Who liked to sprawl out on the table, Then cry to her man, "Stuff in all you can -- Get your balloc6P3>ks in, too, if you're able." : ~i `3A73319 There once was a girl named Mcgoffin Who was diddled amazingly often. She was rogered by scores Who'd been turned down by whores, And a:S/3was finally screwed in her coffin. x3 @7c3320 A stout Gaelic warrior, McPherson, Was having a captive, a person Who was not averse Though she had the curse, And he'd breeches of br7؅)3istling furs on. 3 07w3321 There was a young Scot in Madrid Who got fifty-five fucks for a quid. When they said, "Are you faint?" He replied, "No, I ain't, But IA<[#4 don't feel as good as I did." Ol*x 3 8 ~4 322 There was a young fellow of Mayence Who fucked his own arse, in defiance Not only of custom And morals, dad-bust him, But most of the чX4known laws of science. u . p4 8945323 The woman who lives on the moon Is still cherishing the balloon Of an earthling who'd come And given her some, But had dribbled away aw?4Sll too soon. Ӈx 45 8/~4+324 There is a young faggot named Mose Who insists that you fuck his long nose. And you'll double the joy Of this lecherous boy If you'll `jJE6H4:tickle his balls with your toes. {{ @4+84{325 There was an Old Man of the Mountain Who frigged himself into a fountain Fifteen times had he spent, Still he wasn't content, He simplE"4y got tired of the counting. zLS{px 4{ 8T4326 There was a young lady named Nance Who learned about fucking in France, And when you'd insert it She'd squeeze till she hurt it, And sA|#k4hoved it right back in your pants. -,4 @8g4327 A studious professor named Nestor Bet a whore all his books that he could best her. But she drained out his balls And skipped up the wal~T6q4ls, Beseeching poor Nestor to rest her. W|Nx 4 x8{~4v328 The late Brigham Young was no neuter -- No faggot, no fairy, no fruiter. Where ten thousand virgins Succumbed to his urgin's There now H5 stands the great State of Utah. *Y# @4v95329 There was a young girl of Newcastle Whose charms were declared universal. While one man in front Wired into her cunt, Anothere was engZ^Bm5/aged at her arsehole. ݰux5 X9#~5330 There was a young girl from New York Who plugged up her cunt with a cork. A woodpecker or two Made the grade it is true, But it totallmqw>~5)y baffled the stork. Till along came a man who presented A tool that was strangely indented. With a dizzying twirl He punctured that girω7858l, And thus was the cork-screw invented. !ug@5@5@(5y332 There was a young girl named O'Clare Whose body was covered with hair. It was really quite fun To probe with one's gun, For her quimmyw 5 might be anywhere. zs35y H9Z~5N333 There once was a gay young Parisian Who screwed an appendix incision, And the girl of his choice Could hardly rejoice At the horrible rӇ`5]lack of precision. Umx P5N9~5_334 While spending the winter at Pau Lady Pamela forgot to say "No." So the head-porter made her The second-cook laid her; The waiters wers`5ne all hanging low. ΋ P5_9~5p335 There was a young girl of Penzance Who boarded a bus in a trance. The passengers fucked her, Likewise the conductor. The driver shot oxW2`5f in his pants. (ex @5p:!~6336 The Shah of the Empire of Persia Lay for days in a sexual merger. When the nautch asked the Shah, "Won't you ever withdraw?" He replieyWsH6d with a yawn, "It's inertia." ! 06:E6'337 A remarkable race are the Persians, They have such peculiar diversions. They screw the whole day In a regular way, And save up the nigWx6Ehts for perversions. Fx6' P:6~6%338 There was a young girl of Rangoon Who was blocked by the Man in the Moon. "Well, it has been great fun," She remarked when he'd done, D@Ph864"But I'm sorry you came quite so soon." 8# x6%:6q339 There was a young lady named Ransom Who was rogered three times in a hansom. When she cried out for more A voice from the floor Said, 1&6"My name is Simpson, not Samson." To=x6q 8:]~6K340 A maestro directing in Rome Had a quaint way of driving it home. Whoever he climbed Had to keep her tail timed To the beat of his old U4{uh6Zmetronome. ?K% 6K:6341 "Last night," said a lassie named Ruth, "In a long-distance telephone booth, I enjoyed the perfection Of an ideal connection -- I was:#.6 screwed, if you must know the truth." x6 `;6342 Said a lesbian lady, "It's sad; Of all the girls that I've had, None gave me the thrill Of real rapture until I learned how to be a tr*56ibade." 9/'|6 h;6343 There once was a handsome young seaman Who with ladies was really a demon. In peace or in war, At sea or on shore, He could certainly %7dish out the semen. U$M x6 H;'~7344 Said a girl being had in a shanty, "My dear, you have got it in slanty." He replied, "I can use Any angle I choose. I ride as I pleaseF7CW`7 -- I'm Duranty!" o) H7;s~7!345 An old couple just at Shrovetide Were having a piece -- when he died. The wife for a week Sat tight on his peak, And bounced up and do )!q`70wn as she cried. 80efx @7!;~72346 My wife is an amorous soul On fire for an African's pole. She told a coon chauffeur That he was her gopher -- And, say, did he go for 2vA|D~7Aher hole! As he creamed my wife's cunt, the coon said, "I could fuck this until she was dead!" As he plugged up her trough, I jerked mysuχ07Pelf off; "If that's how you feel, go ahead!" vl|+`72`72@a.m~7U348 There was a young lady of Spain Who was fucked by a monk in a drain. They did it again And again and again, And again and again and agbNp7dain. ;W- `7Uh<~7e349 There was a young man from Nantucket Whose prick was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin As he wiped up hqDB{7tis chin, " If my nose were a cunt I could fuck it". x 7eH<'7350 There was a young man from LeDoux, Whose limericks stopped at line two. g`=/<7h<*8351 If, inside a circle, a line Hits the center and runs spine to spine, And the line's legnth is D, The Circumfernce will be D times 3.14159>8# xpGx`8 0<3~8352 To bear offspring, Noah's snakes were unable. Their fertility was somewhat unstable. He constructed a bed out of tree trunks and said, C~1l88!`even adders can multiply on a log table.' [H 1 8<8K353 A young sports car driver names Breen Had the fastest machine on the seen. He drove fast as light, And with No cops in sight He'd blues38ihift the red lights to green. i/D0x8K